As eyes fall upon an expensive, unused piece of exercise equipment, an excessively-frugal flying reptile suddenly realizes the untapped potential of a healthy lifestyle after decades of decline and self-denial.

Hopeful for the first time in ages, the pot-bellied penny-pincher eschews convention to offer what it sincerely considers a perfectly reasonable purchase price, only to leave empty-handed after being flatly refused a "firm but fair" offer to take it off her lawn for a fiver.